Domestic Abuse - Understanding the warning signs of and abusive relationship

The 16 days of action campaign team have been supported by real survivors of domestic abuse from within Defence to help spread awareness that this is something that affects our people, and to champion their voices in sharing their experiences so that people can understand through this first-hand insight. 

This account focuses on some of the tell-tale signs of an abusive relationship and how a series of small little things, when added together, start to build a broader story of a ‘pattern’ of abusive behaviours.

Recognising the Signs of Domestic Abuse

* Jealousy

* Possessiveness

* Unpredictability

* A bad temper

* Cruelty to animals

* Verbal abuse

* Controlling behaviour

* Antiquated beliefs about roles of women and men in relationships

* Forced sex or disregard of their partner's unwillingness to have sex

* Sabotage of birth control methods or refusal to honour agreed upon methods

* Blaming the victim for anything bad that happens

* Sabotage or obstruction of the victim's ability to work or attend school

* Controls all the finances

* Abuse of other family members, children or pets

* Accusations of the victim flirting with others or having an affair

* Control of what the victim wears and how they act

* Demeaning the victim either privately or publicly

* Embarrassment or humiliation of the victim in front of others

* Harassment of the victim at work

* Hyper-Critical or Judgmental Towards You

* Ignore Boundaries or Invade Your Privacy

* Manipulative

* Dismiss You and Your Feelings